What do you do when you feel like the universe is working directly against you? So something doesn’t go your way, it bums you out, you stew for a day or two. You shake it off a little bit. One day you decide to laugh at it. And then another you accept it. It’s cool, life goes on.
Then it happens again.
You choose to let your insecurity provide you with comfort because that just “makes sense”.
You’re probably not pretty enough. You probably resemble a beached whale. You’re probably not smart enough too. You probably can’t paint as well, and you definitely weren’t worthy to be the topless girl in the photo. You didn’t play hard-to-get, so that makes you less appealing than that other girl. Money is a thing, and you’re right, you don’t have it. Oh, and he has a girlfriend? Of course he does. There’re a lot of other applicants? Well, there’s no way I’m the best. And yeah, you probably just are a beached whale.
You become this poor little victim with doe eyes and a free pass to watch shitty Netflix TV for hours on end. Who cares, anyway, right?
So yeah, what do you do when it feels like the universe is working directly against you?
You trust it.
Sit with it. Listen to it. Learn its language and feel its lesson. You accept there’s a method to its madness, and you realize you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be in the form you’re meant to take.
And you adapt not to it, but with it. It’s been taking me awhile to accept I’m not “soaking” these lessons in anymore in the hot Central American sun, but I’m learning to take the stings on my skin from the crisp fall air as a reminder that it’s all working. I am feeling, and I am alive, and for that, I am grateful.